Thursday, November 18, 2010
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
quack
After bath, Daegan came out of the bathroom wrapped in bubbles and a hooded duck towel.
"Boo!"
"Baby, ducks don't Boo. They quack."
"Quack"
"Anyone ever tell you you make one cute duck?"
"Silly mommy! Don't you listen to daddy? He thinks I am a cute duck ALL THE TIME. Today, you think I am a cute duck. You know what you get, mommy?"
"What, baby?"
He whips his towel open...
"PENIS! PENIS! QUACK QUACK! PENIS!"
"Ummm..."
"It's funny, mommy. It's funny 'cause ducks have penises!"
"Boo!"
"Baby, ducks don't Boo. They quack."
"Quack"
"Anyone ever tell you you make one cute duck?"
"Silly mommy! Don't you listen to daddy? He thinks I am a cute duck ALL THE TIME. Today, you think I am a cute duck. You know what you get, mommy?"
"What, baby?"
He whips his towel open...
"PENIS! PENIS! QUACK QUACK! PENIS!"
"Ummm..."
"It's funny, mommy. It's funny 'cause ducks have penises!"
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
sales fail
A few days ago, I was at Sam's Club when I heard an announcement that if I would head back to the back of the store, I could get a free gift.
When I got there, I was told that if I would watch a 2min demonstration, I would get a FREE three-way slicer. Score (?) I figured free is free, and Xmas is right around the corner, so why not, right?
It turns out the slicer was a POS. I threw it away. The free gift was actually the demonstration, which still makes me giggle.
The girl was using her sales voice and demonstrating some knives- how they would cut through a hammer's steel and STILL gently slice a tomato!
"NEVER DULLS!
LIFETIME GUARENTEE!
WATCH AS I SLICE THROUGH THIS HAMMER- THE KNIFE IS UNDAMAGED!"
Then, she slices through the hammer, and as she does she says:
"Don't try this at home with your knives. If you do, you will end up with a drawer full of butter knives. I use a new one each time."
LOL.
I thought they never dulled.
Sales fail.
When I got there, I was told that if I would watch a 2min demonstration, I would get a FREE three-way slicer. Score (?) I figured free is free, and Xmas is right around the corner, so why not, right?
It turns out the slicer was a POS. I threw it away. The free gift was actually the demonstration, which still makes me giggle.
The girl was using her sales voice and demonstrating some knives- how they would cut through a hammer's steel and STILL gently slice a tomato!
"NEVER DULLS!
LIFETIME GUARENTEE!
WATCH AS I SLICE THROUGH THIS HAMMER- THE KNIFE IS UNDAMAGED!"
Then, she slices through the hammer, and as she does she says:
"Don't try this at home with your knives. If you do, you will end up with a drawer full of butter knives. I use a new one each time."
LOL.
I thought they never dulled.
Sales fail.
shaping up
Yesterday, Daegan went to the store with me, picked out a cucumber, and got ready for snack time.
"Skin on or off?"
"Off."
"Sliced into circles or ribbons?"
"Circles."
I cut the cucumber, handing him the plate.
He bursts into tears. Whatever it was, it was tragic.
"What in the world, honey?"
"I..sob....I can't...sob....I can't eat these! wail!!!!"
"Why in the world not?!? I did just what you asked."
"Mommy, you said circles!! THESE ARE OCTOGONS!!!"
ugh. I spent the next 20 minutes explaining that cucumbers are cucumbers regardless of shape.
Kids are SO IRRATIONAL.
"Skin on or off?"
"Off."
"Sliced into circles or ribbons?"
"Circles."
I cut the cucumber, handing him the plate.
He bursts into tears. Whatever it was, it was tragic.
"What in the world, honey?"
"I..sob....I can't...sob....I can't eat these! wail!!!!"
"Why in the world not?!? I did just what you asked."
"Mommy, you said circles!! THESE ARE OCTOGONS!!!"
ugh. I spent the next 20 minutes explaining that cucumbers are cucumbers regardless of shape.
Kids are SO IRRATIONAL.
Friday, November 5, 2010
Peace and Fundamentalism
You know those moments in your life which fundamentally change who you are, adding to the the construction of your values, beliefs, perspective, empathy?
Yesterday, I went to hear Eliza Grizwold talk about the seven years she spent as a female journalist in the most bloody, dangerous, war-torn parts of the Middle East, Asia, and Africa. For a traveling journalist, she surprised me right away by entering a room full of people in three-piece suits and high heels... dressed in a grungy-fashionable sweater and her hair pulled back into an oily ponytail. I liked her immediately.
Then, when she began to speak, she wrapped a spell with the eloquence, passion and intimate knowledge of the complexities of the area. Unlike her compatriots in the press, she declined to dismiss problems as resulting from one source or as having blame, or easy solutions. She really understood the depth of the issues, and proposed no quick fixes.
She spoke for about an hour about the politics in the area, and how those politics blend with religion, money, resources, ethnicity and (shockingly) geography and climate, to create the issues faced overseas. I don't want to sit here and recant those stories, that isn't the point of this post.
What I do want to share with you is something poignant she mentioned about peace. This is the part that I will integrate into the very core of my being.
In the Q&A section of the discussion, she was asked if in all her experience in the area, did she ever witness moments or communities in which the different religious factions were able to live peacefully together?
Her answer: All the time. In fact, despite the way the violence is portrayed in the media, most of the time. The violence only really exists in critical areas, and it is terrible in those areas, that can't be diminished and shouldn't be.
She recounted the story of a small village in which there were two fundamentalist warlords (Ethiopia, I think, but I could be wrong.) One warlord was Fundamentalist Christian, the other was Fundamentalist Muslim. You have to understand the context here: two men, both with literal armies behind them, both believing their way is the only way, verbatim according to their religious text, and that all other ways are evil, living in a small town together. Sounds like it shouldn't work, but it does. Eliza told us about how peace existing in this town was a constant, community effort. The two leaders had chosen to work together on the basis that there were literally not enough resources to split, and not enough lives to spare in a battle.
This peace was the result of two programs: first, a community outreach program which sold stoves to the women for $100, when the cost of running their old wood stoves was $300 a year, saving $200 (a HUGE deal in those economies.) Wood is becoming increasingly scarce due to climate change, so this reduces battles over resources between the factions.
Second, acknowledging that all systems of religious dogma have incredibly violent passages in their texts which can, and have, be pulled out of context to justify acts of extreme violence against the "other," or non-believers, they are making an effort to put those passages back into the context of the religion. Then, by teaching peaceful passages alongside re-contextualized violent passages, they can stay true to their fundamentalism and still believe that their way is literally the only way, without creating battle zones in their home town.
The message? Peace is possible. Fundamentalism isn't the real reason for violence, it is only the identified reason. The problem is so much more complex than "religious people fight to defend their beliefs."
Interesting, huh?
It disposes of a very common worldview held by those here in the west of the violence over there, AND it was collaborated by refugees in the audience who agreed with her on literally everything.
I am very interested in buying her book- I am sure an hour talk did not do it justice, and if she writes with the same passion and eloquence and maturity which which she speaks, I am sure her book will be life-changing.
It is called The Tenth Parallel: Dispatches from the fault line between Christianity and Islam, and is officially on my Christmas wish list.
***
Note, especially for Robyn:
One question she was asked was, "What was it like to be a journalist covering these issues, speaking to warlords and even President Bashir, as a woman?"
Her answer: "Easier than if I were a man. My gender shocked people, and that shock gave me 15 seconds to get away if they were running up to bomb us. It also gave me a sexlessness in interviews with leaders which prevented much of the male posturing which occurs. It is also expensive and immoral to kidnap a woman, not saying it doesn't happen as we all know, because she has to have her own room, female guards, etc." (Quote is approximate, from memory)
I just thought that was interesting. ;)
Yesterday, I went to hear Eliza Grizwold talk about the seven years she spent as a female journalist in the most bloody, dangerous, war-torn parts of the Middle East, Asia, and Africa. For a traveling journalist, she surprised me right away by entering a room full of people in three-piece suits and high heels... dressed in a grungy-fashionable sweater and her hair pulled back into an oily ponytail. I liked her immediately.
Then, when she began to speak, she wrapped a spell with the eloquence, passion and intimate knowledge of the complexities of the area. Unlike her compatriots in the press, she declined to dismiss problems as resulting from one source or as having blame, or easy solutions. She really understood the depth of the issues, and proposed no quick fixes.
She spoke for about an hour about the politics in the area, and how those politics blend with religion, money, resources, ethnicity and (shockingly) geography and climate, to create the issues faced overseas. I don't want to sit here and recant those stories, that isn't the point of this post.
What I do want to share with you is something poignant she mentioned about peace. This is the part that I will integrate into the very core of my being.
In the Q&A section of the discussion, she was asked if in all her experience in the area, did she ever witness moments or communities in which the different religious factions were able to live peacefully together?
Her answer: All the time. In fact, despite the way the violence is portrayed in the media, most of the time. The violence only really exists in critical areas, and it is terrible in those areas, that can't be diminished and shouldn't be.
She recounted the story of a small village in which there were two fundamentalist warlords (Ethiopia, I think, but I could be wrong.) One warlord was Fundamentalist Christian, the other was Fundamentalist Muslim. You have to understand the context here: two men, both with literal armies behind them, both believing their way is the only way, verbatim according to their religious text, and that all other ways are evil, living in a small town together. Sounds like it shouldn't work, but it does. Eliza told us about how peace existing in this town was a constant, community effort. The two leaders had chosen to work together on the basis that there were literally not enough resources to split, and not enough lives to spare in a battle.
This peace was the result of two programs: first, a community outreach program which sold stoves to the women for $100, when the cost of running their old wood stoves was $300 a year, saving $200 (a HUGE deal in those economies.) Wood is becoming increasingly scarce due to climate change, so this reduces battles over resources between the factions.
Second, acknowledging that all systems of religious dogma have incredibly violent passages in their texts which can, and have, be pulled out of context to justify acts of extreme violence against the "other," or non-believers, they are making an effort to put those passages back into the context of the religion. Then, by teaching peaceful passages alongside re-contextualized violent passages, they can stay true to their fundamentalism and still believe that their way is literally the only way, without creating battle zones in their home town.
The message? Peace is possible. Fundamentalism isn't the real reason for violence, it is only the identified reason. The problem is so much more complex than "religious people fight to defend their beliefs."
Interesting, huh?
It disposes of a very common worldview held by those here in the west of the violence over there, AND it was collaborated by refugees in the audience who agreed with her on literally everything.
I am very interested in buying her book- I am sure an hour talk did not do it justice, and if she writes with the same passion and eloquence and maturity which which she speaks, I am sure her book will be life-changing.
It is called The Tenth Parallel: Dispatches from the fault line between Christianity and Islam, and is officially on my Christmas wish list.
***
Note, especially for Robyn:
One question she was asked was, "What was it like to be a journalist covering these issues, speaking to warlords and even President Bashir, as a woman?"
Her answer: "Easier than if I were a man. My gender shocked people, and that shock gave me 15 seconds to get away if they were running up to bomb us. It also gave me a sexlessness in interviews with leaders which prevented much of the male posturing which occurs. It is also expensive and immoral to kidnap a woman, not saying it doesn't happen as we all know, because she has to have her own room, female guards, etc." (Quote is approximate, from memory)
I just thought that was interesting. ;)
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
A Month of Thanks- Teaching Gratitude to Small Children
Oy.
I was stuck in an MRI machine for a half hour this morning, concentrating on lying very still and trying not to let that cold feeling of claustrophobic panic get a grip on my psyche. Instead of picturing myself laying in a coffin or listening to the loud, rhythmic banging of the machine, I closed my eyes and meditated instead.
I meditated on thankfulness, as inspired by our new entry into the month of November and our pending downward sanity spiral into Christmas.
How can I teach thankfulness to Daegan? Do we just have tons of conversations about it (snore)? What examples can I use to describe thankfulness?
As I ran through a list of possible alternatives, I realized something about the nature of thankfulness. It requires a knowledge of a contrast.
I am thankful to have air to breath,(because some planets do not have that.)
I am thankful to have shoes on my feet, (because I know that it is only by chance that I was born into a culture, area, time which made them accessible.)
I am thankful for my family, (because so many people don't have families.)
I am thankful to be alive, (because being dead would be sooo boring.)
All of my thankfuls had an implied contrast. This inspired another thought: Can a child, who by nature has a limited ability to understand the many dimensions and details of our world and who, by the nature of these cognitive and social limitations, is unable to successfully draw appropriate contrasts without being instructed in the process of developing these thoughts, really understand the word thankful?
Gratitude is something that is very important in our family culture- it tells those around you that you recognize their efforts and love them. The nature of contrasting builds empathy and a desire to help others. Developing the cognitive scripts which result in gratitude also develops the ability to really put oneself into another's shoes. Plus, research shows that people who are grateful (as opposed to those who constantly desire more) are happier, healthier people and (presumably due to decreased cortisol levels) live longer.
Real gratitude, real thankfulness, is something that is a skill- it takes time to learn, to practice, and to eventually (hopefully) master.
So, back to teaching it to a three and a half year old.
Turns out, there is a surprising lack of research out there about really teaching this virtue. I am not all that surprised, considering our culture is not really gratitude-friendly... but still...
We are going to try talking to him about it over dinner each night, modeling it with each other, and making a gratitude garland. We are going to take one leaf each night and color, write or cut out pictures of things we are thankful for and hang it in the house. Hopefully, by the end of the month, it will be full and abundant.
Just trying to keep it age-appropriate.
How are YOU teaching gratitude in your house? I am very interested in ideas! :)
adventure!
Check out what I made last night! :) Every once in a while, I crash a meeting of the local craft club, organized by two very awesome, independently cool and crafty mamas. The blocks are made of 2x4's, so the whole thing, when not stacked, extends 36".
As a family, we decided that one of our key themes and philosophy would be adventure. What does this mean? This means that we frame almost everything as an adventure. This implies a host of other values and perspectives, including being in the moment, flexibility, and minimalism.
If we are leaving to run errands all morning, I tell Daegan, "We are going on an adventure! We have to go shopping and running errands. Who knows what the day is going to bring?" Ever notice that in an adventure, nothing ever goes wrong? If I have a plan, and we have to deviate, then that is a negative experience. But if we are going on an adventure, deviations are welcome and experienced with a sense of wonder, in a way... like, "Whoa, cool! Who knew our day would take us here."
I love adventures. :)
Monday, November 1, 2010
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